Dax: A Pet Loss Story

The following pet loss story was shared with DoveLewis Pet Loss Support Director Enid Traisman from Maurine Gallup. 

When the Trillium bloom again at the trails edge, your paw prints and my shoe tracks will have been erased by gentle raindrops and hard downpours. My memory of that glorious day of just the two of us on the trail though, will never be erased.

When the pain of your death (not your passing, as your death was horrific) has become more of a sadness rather than continuous stabs to the depth of my being; I will do my best to remember there were good doctors and technicians in your too short life that cared about you almost as much as I did.

When I begin to forget the patterns of your beautiful black and white coat, I will pour intently over photos of you to remember every little detail. From the stripe up your nose, that looked like someone dipped an artist’s brush in white paint and gently ran a brush stroke up your muzzle, to the uncanny resemblance of Mount Hood on your back, you were unique in every way.

When I look at your littermate Sasha, grieving in her own way with too much sleep and soul-wrenching whimpering in her dreams, I pray that your life and her life will not become a modern day version of “Where The Red Fern Grows”.

When I think about your eyes, those dark chocolate pools, they held the whole universe in them and will forever haunt me. You would gaze at me so intently as if to say “Play with me. Pay attention to me. I won’t be on this earth for long”.

When I hold your urn of ashes in my hands and stroke the urn, I wish with all my heart I was stroking your big, soft, floppy hound ears instead.

When I think of your short, star-crossed life, I hope I gave you the utmost care and attention that you so richly deserved, as you rescued me so much more than I rescued you.

When we meet again my sweet boy, my heart will no longer ache, as the ton of boulders made up of sorrow and tears, will be lifted. Your lungs that struggled so hard to take in oxygen will be restored. Wait for me sweet Dax. We will walk on the trail forever with the Trillium waving in the gentle breeze at the trails edge.