Orange: A Pet Loss Story

The following pet loss story was shared with DoveLewis Pet Loss Support Director Enid Traisman from Sara Inskeep. Please feel free to submit your own pet loss story here

On May 26th, 2011 I walked through the front door. I was greeted by one of the CVT and she took me to the back of the clinic to get started on treating the hospitalized patients. I was asked to go get the squawking cat out of his kennel. He was a diabetic and needed to have his glucose checked before we could feed him. 
I entered the kennel room and walked up to his run. He looked up at me and our eyes locked. I saw a twinkle in his eye. I opened the door and picked up his whopping 13 lb muscular body. He immediately started purring. As I carried him over to the treatment table, I thought; “I like this guy. We’re gonna be buddies!” Slowly but surely, we gained each other’s trust which very quickly turned into this intense, unconditional, unwavering love for each other. 

Over the years, my coworkers commented on his love for me. He would literally hunt me down. There were a few vacations I took in those years and every time “Orange” somehow knew I was leaving. He would run after me as I walked down the main hallway to head out the front door. Then he would sit and watch me at the front door until I left. 

In June 2011 my sister’s beloved dog Bruno got a terminal diagnosis—Cancer. We elected to keep him comfortable until he was ready to leave this world. After we got the diagnosis, I sat in the lobby of my new job and cried. Bruno was only 5. This wasn’t fair! I looked down, and there was my buddy, “Orange”! He jumped up onto the couch and layed down next to me. Four months later, Bruno’s time on this earth was complete. He crossed the Rainbow Bridge in October 2011. In April 2012, my sister experienced another devastating loss. Her 9 month old puppy, “Joey” (who they had brought home the previous September after learning that Bruno was terminal) was playing in the backyard with their other Labrador and his collar (buckle) got stuck on her teeth. “Joey” ended up breaking his neck in an attempt to get free. 

“Orange” was right there to offer love and snuggles after “Joey” died.

 

I had made multiple promises to Orange. And I tried my best to keep them. I told him I would always love him. I told him that eventually he would come home to live with me. I wasn’t able to keep that second promise. In the time that I knew him, he had a couple close calls but he fought and won those battles to stay just a little bit longer.

 

On the morning of January 17th, 2016 I got a phone call at 8:30 from my coworker. I sent it to voicemail. Almost immediately after that, the hospital manager called me. Something was wrong. I picked up. 
She told me something was going on with Orange and he might not make it. Before she could finish the sentence, I bolted out of bed throwing clothes on as I ran out the door. I raced to the clinic (I’m surprised that I didn’t get a ticket). Orange was laying in his bed in the front of the clinic. He gave out this horrendous yowl. Something was going on. We weren’t sure what. I said, “Hey Mister. What’s going on? You doin’ okay, Bubs?” At the sound of my voice and the feel of my hand stroking his head. Orange seemed to start to come out of it. His blood glucose was “Low” (below 30). My coworkers said he had had what they thought were seizures. He hadn’t been willing to take anything by mouth. I offered him some Recovery out of my hand when he became more alert. He was so ravenous he accidently bit my finger. I put his bed on the floor and sat next to him. I thought, “Maybe he’s coming out of this.” He stood up and slowly walked over and climbed into my lap and up into my arms. Then he went unconscious. We tried to kick up his blood sugar—no luck. I could feel his body cooling down. I tempted him, 98.2 (Normal is 100-102.5) I tried to warm him up by swaddling in a blanket and against my body. No improvement. About 5 minutes later, Orange seized. I called my hospital manager (also Lead CVT) back. She was going to head our direction, to see if she could help. For the next 30 minutes, Orange had 4 more seizures. I called her back. I pleaded with her to let me take him to the ER (Tanasbourne Veterinary Emergency Clinic) to end his suffering. He was trying to cross the Rainbow Bridge (having one seizure after another) She authorized it. I called the ER and let them know we were coming in. He continued to have seizures in my arms en route to the ER.

 

We got there quickly. It was fairly quiet. (Probably because I am a veterinary assistant) they let me carry him to the treatment area. I told the doctor and staff that this was a one way trip for Orange. (My boss was out of the country and we had previously discussed that if something happened to Orange, he did not want any heroics performed) Orange was unresponsive upon his examination. They placed an IV catheter. I picked him up and carried him to the exam room. They kindly gave us a few minutes. They asked me if I wanted to step out. I said no. The Dr came in with the medicine. His body absorbed the medications quickly. Within minutes, my sweet ginger kitty was gone. I bawled harder than I had ever had in my life. I wasn’t ready. My chest hurt. I felt as thought my heart was broken.

 

Orange was my best friend, my secret keeper, my boo! He caught my tears. He was sassy and opinionated. I didn’t know how much I loved that sassy, ginger kitty until he was gone. There are no words to describe the hurt that one feels losing their beloved pet. Until you have personally experienced losing a pet you can’t truly know how it feels.

 

It’s been 17 days since I held my boy as he took his last breath. I would give anything to have Orange back. To hear him sass me, to feel his fuzzy head against my lips as I kissed him over and over again. I don’t think there is anything that can fill the void I have in my heart. Losing your pet is never something you get over. Working in this field, seeing death on a daily basis makes losing our pets that much more difficult. Through losing my Orange, I’ve learned that it is OKAY to grieve. It’s okay to take some time to yourself. 

I carry Orange’s collar on my key ring. I have his pawprints tattooed on my left forearm. And He was finally able to come home with me last week. I will take him with me where ever I go.

 

Orange-bear, thank you for loving me unconditionally. Thank you for the lengthy conversations, and the constant cuddles. I miss you so much every day since you left this earth. Rest easy Bubs! I love you, SO MUCHES!!!

 

Thank you Enid for having me at the group session on the 21st. I really appreciate the support I received there. It really helped me start to process Orange’s death and begin to grieve my boy’s loss.